What Kind of Family Leader Are You?
Are you a Visionary, Builder, Shepherd, Accumulator…or something else?
Every family has a leader.
But not every leader leads the same way.
Some men lead through strategy. Others through sacrifice. Some through presence and nurture. Others through grit and grind.
What about you?
There are six distinct leadership styles for patriarchs.
Each have a different leadership style, strengths, and preferences to grow a strong family.
What you are will largely determines how best to go about setting up your family culture and what kinds of assets and systems you’ll build to create a lasting legacy.
As the Patriarch of your family. understanding this is the first step to forge your family to last 200+ years, and ensure your family name means something
You’ll likely recognize yourself in one…
But it might not be the one you want to be.
I’ve actually created a 2 minute test you can take to uncover your type.
🧠 The Visionary
You see a future your family could rise into.
Strategic, meaningful, and bigger than any individual.
Under your direction, every generation will build on the last. A state of perpetual growth, underlined by family unity.
You’re driven by legacy, long-term planning, and the idea of putting the pieces into place to turn your family into something that outlives you.
But without action, vision fades.
If you want to lead, your family needs to hear your vision, and see you pursuing it every day.
📈 The Accumulator
You’re focused on steady gains, disciplined habits, and protecting what you’ve built.
Stability and security is a priority. You prefer to take it slow and steady and are typically risk averse, choosing to protect capital and connections rather than taking chances on higher risk plays.
You value stability, savings, and taking steady ground over time. Risk isn’t your style - you’d rather be sure.
You are likely best suited to building a portfolio of assets, supplementing and growing your income through climbing the ladder of employment or adding side hustles to supplement income and grow your portfolio faster.
Outside of what you accumulate, your children will also inherit your philosophy.
But sometimes safety and security becomes a cage.
Slow and steady may win the race, but what happens after the finish line?
You know how to build wealth… just be careful not to play so safe that you miss real opportunity.
🛠 The Builder
As an action-oriented man, your eye is on legacy over luxury.
You build things worth handing over; reputation, systems, a network, businesses, and opportunities your children can join or inherit.
You’re laying a foundation that may not necessarily pay off in your lifetime, but it can be the launch pad for your descendants.
But if it all depends on you, it’ll crumble when you step away.
Remember to get your kids involved, and to not make your entire life revolve around what you’re building, and give energy to those you’re building it for.
🐑 The Shepherd
You’re the anchor of your home - the emotional bedrock of the family.
Loyal, consistent, deeply present—you lead through nurture, not dominance.
Your fairness is a strength, but leadership sometimes demands clarity, firmness, and hard truths.
You may also neglect your own needs in order to make sure others have what they need, but a weary leader can’t lead well, so carve out time for yourself to grow, recover, and reflect.
Harmony can’t come at the cost of your strength.
At some point, you’ll need to make the hard call and be the voice of direction when your family needs it.
🥊 The Warrior
You’re not afraid to take responsibility to step up and do what needs to be done. No matter how hard things get, you show up.
You take responsibility seriously and will do whatever it takes to provide and protect.
If you grind too hard, eventually you’re turned to dust. Be sure to take time to recover and rebuild.
Remember the most important kind of capital you create for a lasting legacy is that of the connection with your family, don’t let today’s battle get in the way of the war.
Take what you accumulate and put it to work for your family, and rise from combatant to commander.
🧳 The Vagrant
You know you’re meant for more—but don’t yet know what that looks like.
In order to command more love and respect, your family needs you to step into purpose, gain clarity, and begin building something steady.
The good news? Starting from here is better than never starting at all.
Channel your strengths for your family, seek out accountability, and build your skills and wealth to lead your family to greatness.
Which of these do you see yourself most in?
Why not take the test and see if you’re right?
You take it here (3 mins max).
Thanks for reading!
Yours,
Ben Black